My ex husbands girlfriend hates me
I was married for 13 years before I finally cut ties with my ex and we got divorced. My ex-husband and I are great at co-parenting. I have full custody and he has visitation. I knew I would struggle financially and was prepared to give up my cell phone, cable TV, eating out, and even the possibility of having to move to a smaller house or apartment. We moved our families from California to Utah together and used to do everything together vacations, outings, shopping, etc.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Why Does My Ex Hate Me? (And What to Do About It) - Clay Andrews
SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Why Is My Ex So Mean? The Harsh Truth About Your Cruel ExContent:
- My ex’s girlfriend is threatening our amicable co-parenting
- EX HUSBAND’S NEW GIRLFRIEND
- 4 Harsh Truths You MUST Accept When Your Ex Finds New Love
- My Ex-Husband’s Family Still Talks To Me – Women Share Their Stories
- 15 Tips for Dealing with a Toxic Ex-Spouse When Children Are Involved
- I Want My Family to Cut Ties with My Ex. Am I Being Unreasonable?
- When Should Divorced Dads Introduce The New Girlfriend?
My ex’s girlfriend is threatening our amicable co-parenting
If your ex-husband lied to you, betrayed you, shared secrets and a bed with this girlfriend while you were married, your thoughts about her are probably not anything good. I wondered if I should actually meet the girlfriend, while I was still so hurt and angry. I definitely could understand crimes of passion when another woman is involved.
At our meeting, she said it was worth doing it because he had to drive the car through the streets to get it cleaned up. If your ex-husband met the girlfriend well after your divorce … not — amazingly! In fact, I really like the woman my ex eventually married. I often wondered if she had any idea that he had had at least two affairs while he was married to me, and the last one destroyed our marriage.
I met her in his office at work. I still shudder that I put myself in those circumstances. Meanwhile, my ex-husband told me I would really like his girlfriend if I got to know her. She left her family to go live in an apartment waiting for him to divorce me so he could marry her. He also told me she was a very spiritual person.
Witches are spiritual, too, I guess. Just saying. Want to start healing today? Take the first steps in your recovery with our crash course. How could he throw away 25 years of marriage for someone the same age as our daughters, or for someone who has left her own family like he has left his?
As women, we tend to blame ourselves first. What could I have done differently? From an early age, girls and women compare ourselves with each other. But, honestly, if a husband is willing to leave his marriage for some sweet young thing, there is not much any of us can do to stop that.
The solution is not to have a girlfriend and turn into a liar and a cheat and put your family through an agonizing, embarrassing soap opera. For me, the determining factor of whether to meet the girlfriend or other woman or new wife totally depends on if you have younger children or not. For some reason, many ex-husbands feel compelled to introduce the girlfriend to their children and friends as soon as they can.
Or she just happens to be there when your children are supposed to have a weekend with their Dad. The weather? Our ex-husbands somehow think that everyone will welcome this new woman with open arms. Older children usually have more reservations. The reality is, if this is the path their father has chosen, they have to either figure out a way to live with it or not.
Older children are more involved in their own lives and are trying to figure out what kind of relationship with both parents is best for them. Our older children are smart enough to figure out the relationships that work for them. We need to give them the freedom to do that. Even though I write those words now, during and after my divorce, the very hardest times for me were when my children were all off at the lake or at the country club or all together with him and his new woman.
Those are my kids, not hers, and I was sad every single time they were all together having fun without me. We have to find a way to get over that. Our job as mother to our children is to continue to guide them through life the best we can. Their time with us should be good and fun and easy and not stress-filled ordeals. We cannot control anyone else. But we can make the time we spend with our children meaningful and fun and full of love. It is tempting to blame everything that went wrong in our relationship at the end on the girlfriend … the infamous Other Woman.
But it takes two to tango and our husband made the choice to do what he did. No one held a gun to his head. He made the conscious choice to be unfaithful and to put his relationship with her above just about everything else, His children, his career, his extended family and friends, and definitely above our 33 years together.
Having a girlfriend was his choice. However, it does make infidelity easier when there are girlfriends who are willing to knowingly be a part of all of that destruction. It tears your heart out, usually. You see them on the beach together. You see them with friend at a social gathering. Seeing those images brings a pain that is impossible to describe.
Stop looking. Stop asking your kids and your friends about her. Spend your time finding out about yourself and what you want and deserve moving forward. Because the more time you spend obsessing about them, the less time you have to spend creating your own best life. During divorce and the next few years after divorce, most of us vacillate between wanting him back to wanting him dead.
I remember what it felt like to discover … again … that awful, gut-wrenching pain of him lying to my face, or him sneaking off to be with her, or finding out he had met up with her when he was supposed to be somewhere else. Dealing with the new girlfriend or other woman is one of the most difficult parts of divorce, especially if you miss your ex-husband.
The sooner you forget about her and focus on getting your best life back, the better. Let us connect you with other women on this trip. Divorce can be extremely painful. Our free five day crash course can help you start healing. He cheated while we were married and afterward 2 times wanted to work it out with me only to dump me both times for a younger woman. How stupid can one woman be right? My ex husband was rude and demanding… when I divorced him.
He wants to be friends and show off his new girlfriend and kids. It makes me sick. One of your best blogs ever!!! I have spent many a day and night just being consumed by the infidelity of both of them. My ex sent me a text that was meant for her, and so began the unraveling of our 43 yr old marriage! She was also married and had become a great liar also! They both called me a psycho because I was spying on them I was a bit looney at the beginning but not a psycho and I was so mad that she would have the audacity to say that to me under the circumstances!!!
Ohhhh boy was I mad….. Such selfish people they are! After reading all your blogs I wish I could have afforded to join your radical group they have been such a huge help to me…I just thank you from the bottom of my heart:. I suggested that since he had 3 kids, each of them could host a holiday in their home thereby enabling their father and his girlfriend to attend. How do I play this? Spot on Suzy. Radical acceptance of the fact that I deserve better!
I know he was knowledgeable and a smart guy when it comes to getting justice for clients,i just concluded my divorce and if you must know ,he has been sleeping with his boss wife at work and we just sent a video of them to the board and he has been issued a sent off letter with immediate effect.
I met a man four years ago after he was divorced. He had two girls. I have two girls as well. We began blending our families and were going to get married last month.
His ex wife was constantly causing trouble m. That meant I had his ex on FaceTime while I was cooking breakfast, out to dinner, or in the car. He refused to set a boundary and ask his daughter to take it outside or to another room because his daughters were brainwashed by their mother to be spies. I was very good to his children and I am by no means anything less than a loving, positive influence on his girls. She sent him threatening texts and emotionally manipulated her own children….
I left the house and called off the wedding. I have an ex that I co parent with. I would never in a million years behave that way towards him. So perhaps ALL parents, including hurt women, need to stop being victims and acknowledge exactly their circumstances and behave better for the children. This man I still love should NOT be badgered and torn apart for trying to have a new life for himself.
There is a recurring theme I see in post-divorce relationships where there are children: a general lack of empathy for the other parent and their children by both the betraying spouse and the mistress or new partner.
No child wants to be separated from either parent, and it is heartbreaking to know that there is so much adult selfishness when kids only have a few years where how their primary caregivers behave and relate to their families will shape their lives.
In separation and divorce where there is infidelity or a rapid relationship replacement, there is shame, guilt, blame, trauma, all of which cloud rational judgement of both natural parents and worse, set the stage for a lifetime of social dysfunction for children because of very poor modelling. It is not the place of a new partner to project opinions, or to play any role whatsoever in the conflicts and struggles of a family who placed faith and trust in someone to preserve safety, security, and wellbeing for their family.
It is truly shocking how mistresses and new partners feel compelled and entitled to do so, without recognizing how their involvement complicates matters further. Empathy and compassion are exchanged for possession and jealousy, which fuels conflict even further, compounding the issues that broken families already face.
If you choose to involve yourself with someone who has previous family responsibilities, you should be equally prepared to respect the boundaries of those affected by that situation.
EX HUSBAND’S NEW GIRLFRIEND
No, this feeling is a completely different animal. She was playing Barbies and explaining why she hated each item of clothing I pulled from the basket. This dress was too long, this shirt too short, most every item far too scratchy. One was too orange. Basically, it was a typical Sunday morning.
If your ex-husband lied to you, betrayed you, shared secrets and a bed with this girlfriend while you were married, your thoughts about her are probably not anything good. I wondered if I should actually meet the girlfriend, while I was still so hurt and angry. I definitely could understand crimes of passion when another woman is involved. At our meeting, she said it was worth doing it because he had to drive the car through the streets to get it cleaned up. If your ex-husband met the girlfriend well after your divorce … not — amazingly!
4 Harsh Truths You MUST Accept When Your Ex Finds New Love
Here's why your opinion doesn't matter Was I jealous? Actually, no. Not in the least. Items on his " how to move on " list? So, how ironic that despite all of his posturing about that agreement being necessary for the good of our daughter To the rather un-celebrated role our daughter played in their wedding. And don't even get me started on what happened to my daughter's poor cat after my ex's cat-allergic new bride moved in. Maddie Cat. But, here's the thing
My Ex-Husband’s Family Still Talks To Me – Women Share Their Stories
Finding out your ex has a girlfriend is never easy, especially after a divorce. But was it jealousy that was controlling my emotions or something else? It started off with just small talk via texting. He would tell me about his day, every day. The texts got more and more personal.
By Tara Lynne Groth. Divorce is the end of a relationship, but how soon should divorced dads introduce the next relationship to their children? While co-parenting with their former spouse , adjusting to a new routine and establishing a separate household, dads may meet someone new whom they want to share their life and family with. Children are adjusting too, and introducing a significant other too soon — or someone who is not a positive influence — can have damaging psychological and emotional effects.
15 Tips for Dealing with a Toxic Ex-Spouse When Children Are Involved
Divorce can never be an easy thing, especially with kids involved. Divorce makes it incredibly tough for both spouses to move on with their lives. Tina Plantamura.
The ongoing drama of navigating single parenting and life after divorce, supported by wine, travelling and friends. I met my ex husbands girlfriend the other day. Obviously, the situation is a little odd. There I was heating up a curry in the microwave, having just put my child to bed. My ex was just pouring me a glass of wine and I was sort of behaving in a slightly proprietorial manner, which was of course completely out of order. Yes, he used to be MY husband and yes they are MY child upstairs, but she was perfectly entitled to be a little put out that I had apparently moved in and was therefore ruining the already limited time she could spend with him.
I Want My Family to Cut Ties with My Ex. Am I Being Unreasonable?
When Should Divorced Dads Introduce The New Girlfriend?